Vegan Millionaire's Shortbread!

Caution: chopped chocolate is dangerously delicious!

Keep stirring!

Almost there!

Here we go!

This dessert was a delicious pain in the butt.
Okay, I exaggerate.  It wasn't so bad, but I am certain that it's not very good for you.  It's full of sugar and Earth Balance margarine, and Soy Creamer (which I will never buy again because it is terrifying).
Still, if you want to make an oldschool dessert, or get that 'you're frigging kidding it's vegan?!' reaction, this is a great dessert to make.
I have no pictures of the final product because, frankly, I'm embarrassed at how it looked.  The thick, set chocolate got hard in the refrigerator and shattered when I tried to cut into it, leading to broken, dusty shapes a co-worker called 'parallelograms'.  If I were to make this again, I'd probably them just after they'd set in the refrigerator instead of waiting until the next day.
The process is basically this:  make shortbread by combining 1/2 cup of Earth Balance or other vegan margarine, 1/4 cup of sugar, and just under two cups of flour (I mixed regular flour with 1/4 cup of rice flour). Press this stuff into a small baking pan lined with wax paper.
Bake at 400 degrees until golden (just keep an eye on it, it could be 15 minutes or closer to 40, depending on the thickness and your oven).  Take it out and let it cool. 
Then:
Combine another 1/2 cup of Earth Balance with 1/4 cup of brown sugar and 1.5 cups of vegan cream in a heavy-bottomed pot.  Bring to a boil and then turn down to medium and allow the mixture to thicken and get dark.  It will take awhile, and you have to stir vigilantly the entire time.  My friend Edie and I took shifts on this one.
When it's thick, amber coloured and greatly reduced, remove it from the heat and continue to stir for a minute or so.  Then pour the guk over the shortbread and gently spread it. 
Refrigerate until set.
Then:
Melt just under 2 cups (about 20g) of chopped chocolate in a double boiler.  When it's melted, pour it over the set cookie and caramel, and spread evenly.
Let them shits cool again.
When it appears fully set, gently lift it out of the container by the edges of the wax paper and try to cut it into squares.  This is where I failed, so I wish you better luck.
Also: you'd better share this or you and your tight-ass jeans will be sorry!